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3 Things You Shouldn't Say to a Grieving Loved One

Apr 05, 2023

When someone you love loses someone in their life, it can be very hard to figure out what to say to them. The last thing you want to do is seem insincere or insensitive. Grieving people can go through a lot of emotions in a short amount of time. According to a study done by WebMD, people who are grieving most commonly suffer from sadness, a low appetite, fatigue, and depression. It's best to be mindful and understanding of what they're going through. People like cremation professionals are very well versed in this and can be a huge help to those grieving, but those who have lost someone are more receptive to people who are close to them. Here are three things not to say to a grieving loved one.



1. Don't Invalidate Their Feelings



Everyone is entitled to their feelings, and it can take longer for some to process them than others. That doesn't mean that you should try to get them to grieve on your timeline. You should avoid saying things that imply they're being dramatic, or that they're taking too long to grieve.


While you might think that you are just trying to get them back on track, it often comes off as insensitive. Step back and let them grieve, and offer a shoulder to cry on if you can. Cremation professionals see people every day in their worst state of grief and show them their best grace. The trick is to let them process their grief in their own way.



2. Don't Use Religion



This is especially insensitive if the loved one is not religious. Even if they are, hearing things like "it was part of God's plan" is often not comforting. It may even anger them in some cases. You don't want to project your own religious notions on someone who is grieving. It's very common for those who experience loss to question their beliefs during this time, and comments about religion may just make them feel worse.



3. Don't Place Blame



Losing a loved one is an extremely difficult time, and it's often easier to be angry rather than sad. That's why many people look for ways to place blame, whether it's on the deceased themselves or someone around them. Placing blame is never healthy, and it won't help your loved one get through their grief. It's more likely to either anger them or cause problems with others, neither of which are good for your loved one. Instead, just be there for them. Follow their lead. Be a comforting shoulder for them to lean on. It will take time, but they will get through it.


Coping with someone's death is often one of the hardest things people go through. If you've lost a loved one, Community Mortuary is here to help. Contact us today to speak with our cremation professionals.

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